Newly dating couples and newlyweds have a lot of affection and skin-to-skin contact, but after years of being together, they start to get into a rut.

Most people feel they want to stay in love forever! However, it’s not uncommon for either men or women to get bored with their partners.

Have you ever thought to yourself, “I don’t get a thrill from what they do for me these days ……,” “I feel safe and secure like a family member,” or “I don’t want to have sex with them anymore”?

If you can think of anything similar, it’s possible that your relationship with your partner is in a rut. A scent-based approach is a great way to break through that situation.

In this article, we’re going to recommend five scents, including the mechanisms by which scents are effective at bedtime.

Bottom banner

Why do couples get in a rut?

The original word “mannerism” is now similar to the meaning “stuck in rut”, which means “lack of freshness and originality”. However, the word is now used in the sense of “boredom” and can be taken to mean that a person is bored with his or her partner, or that the partner is boring and uninspired.

Getting stuck in a rut is proof that you have a good relationship with your partner without any major problems, but if you don’t have any stimulation, your brain gets used to it, and many people take the opportunity of getting stuck in a rut and cheat on their partner.

Also, the longer you stay with your partner, the more time you spend with them and the deeper the relationship becomes, to the point where there is nothing you don’t understand about them. If you see this as a lack of freshness, then you are stuck in a rut.

However, even if you are stuck in a rut, it doesn’t mean that you no longer have affection for your partner, and you may still love him/her as much as you do. In some cases, it is not love but affection, and the relationship has moved to the next level.

A rut may give the impression that the relationship has worsened and you have to break up, but it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s only for the worse, so don’t be in a hurry to deal with it even if you feel like you’re in a rut right now.

Stimulation can also be stressful

To avoid getting into a rut, “wouldn’t it be better if there was always stimulation?”

Some people may think that this is a good idea. But for humans, continuous stimulation is a stress in itself.

It’s less stressful to live an ordinary life every day than it is to have a tumultuous life. The same is true for couples and relationships.

For example, as a couple, the only thing that would be stimulating would be if one of you were to have a crush on the other or cheat on someone else, but it’s not easy to stay in a relationship while worrying about such things.

If you’ve been in a relationship for many years, you may feel like you’re moving on to someone different, but if you really love your current partner, there will always be a day when you regret it.

In the case of couples, having a relationship with someone other than your partner can lead to adultery, and in the worst case scenario, divorce or legal issues.

When this happens, it’s very natural for the relationship to change towards stability because of the stress it causes.

How scent is an effective mechanism for breaking out a rut

Humans have five senses: sight, smell, hearing, touch, and taste, which allow us to perceive our surroundings and what is happening to us.

Among them, the sense of smell is the easiest to influence the brain most quickly. We don’t often forget the nostalgic scents we used to smell or our partner’s body odor after a period of time.

Here’s how scent can help you get out of a rut.

Scent is the only thing that can be transmitted directly to the brain

Scent is invisible to the eye, but is actually a structure of small molecules. Fragrance molecules dissolve into the olfactory epithelium in the mucous membrane of the nose and are transported through the olfactory cells to the olfactory nerve.

From there, they travel to the olfactory bulb, which is also a part of the brain, where they are transported to various parts of the brain.

This is where the olfactory bulb judges whether the scent is something we have smelled before, and since this part of the brain is very sensitive to it, we never forget our memories of a scent.

Have you ever had an experience that you have smelled this scent before, even though you may have forgotten what happened to you? This is because your brain remembers the ingredients of the scent.

Therefore, if you smell a scent when you are sad, it can make you feel sad regardless of your feelings. On the other hand, if you smell a scent when you feel happy, it can make you feel relaxed even if you are feeling sad.

Thus, fragrances are directly related to our emotions, and you can expect a great effect even if you think it is just a scent.

Scents are often directly linked to emotional memories

Memories acquired by the brain through sight, hearing and touch are transported to the hippocampus via a part of the brain called the neocortex.

After that, a person’s memory is converted into a long-term memory that is used many times and remains intact.

However, olfactory aromas are not transported through the neocortex, but directly to the hippocampus, where they are processed.

The location of the hippocampus is located in the limbic system, which is responsible for memory and emotion.

Because it is delivered directly to the hippocampus through the hippocampus, fragrances are deeply connected to memory and emotions.

When you smell a scent that wafts in the air one day, does it remind you of an event or someone you used to know well?

Although the effect is limited to the scent of a certain scent, the scent reminds us of an event or person, like a flashback, which is called the “Proust Effect”.

This is based on the description in the book “A Search for Lost Time” by the French writer Marcel Proust, in which the protagonist remembers his childhood by smelling a madeleine dipped in tea.

By this Proust effect, the scent is connected to our memories and emotions, making us feel nostalgic and sentimental about those days.

How to use scent to get rid of a rut

A rut happens when you get used to your current situation or relationship and feel that it’s no longer fresh.

In some cases, both of you may feel that you are in a rut, and in other cases, one of you may feel that you are in a rut.

If you feel like you’re in a rut, or if you think your partner seems to be feeling it, you need to do something to improve your relationship or nothing will change.

That’s why I recommend trying to use scent to try to repair the relationship. ‘Can scent help you get out of a rut?’

It may be overwhelming for some people, but depending on how you use it, it can bring freshness and love back to your life, so let’s check it out one by one.

Using a memory scent can be effective

I think couples and couples always have a scent that they remember. For example, it can be the perfume or fabric softener that you wore when you first met or when you were just dating. Just remembering the scent can bring back memories of that time, and you can still enjoy that feeling today.

Scents are not just perfumes and fabric softeners, but also body odor and the smell of the house. You won’t recognize body odor if you’ve been together for a long time, but your brain will always remember the scents you’ve intentionally put on.

If you think that “there is nothing fresh about being together these days” or “I don’t feel much excitement” try using the scent of the past as a reminder of what you used to do.

Change your scent regularly

Earlier I mentioned that wearing a memorable scent makes you feel like you are back in the past and brings back the freshness.

If you wear the same perfume all the time, your nose will get used to the scent and it won’t smell so good after a while. It’s no wonder then that it loses its freshness.

Try buying a completely different kind of perfume from time to time, or use a different detergent.

Fragrance is a part of you, so you can create a different you by wearing a different scent.

You can thrill your partner by wearing a different scent with a perfume or body spray.

This always has to be the same scent to be effective, but it’s especially good if you haven’t changed your perfume recently, or if you use a joint fabric softener and haven’t changed it in months.

Changing your own scent can make you feel different and open-minded, too. It can also help you discover a new you, so if you feel like you’re in a rut, I recommend changing your scent.

Five Bedtime Scents

When having sex with a man, if you’re in a rut, you can’t enjoy each other’s company.

It’s a shame that you can’t enjoy bedtime, a time to deepen your love, just because you’re in a rut.

There are several ways to get out of the rut and enjoy sex, but the easiest to use is the scent approach, such as aromas and perfumes.

Scents are easier to incorporate than adult products, and here are five recommended scents that are effective for bedtime. We’re sure you’ll find the right scent for you.

Rose Absolute

Rose Absolute is a rare ingredient that can be extracted from only a few of the many petals and has many benefits for women.

  • Anti-depressant properties
  • Nerve tonic properties
  • Female hormone regulation
  • Muscle relaxation
  • Arousal effect
  • Aphrodisiac action

These benefits are several of the included.

It also has an aphrodisiac effect when used during bedtime, which makes it a passionate tech that makes you want each other. It brings a sense of stability and well-being, so using it during sex can make you both feel very happy.

It also has moisturizing and hair revitalizing properties, making it a scent that has many other benefits for women.

Ylang Ylang

Ylang-ylang is said to be the most feminine scent for men because it smells sweet, with the meaning “flower within a flower”.

It has a relaxing effect by relieving tension and anxiety, while it also has an aphrodisiac effect by increasing elation and increasing sexual desire.

In Indonesia, ylang-ylang petals have been laid on the bed on the wedding night since ancient times, so you can see how it enhances and enlivens the feelings during sex.

Other benefits include:

  • Antidepressant effect
  • Calming effect
  • Sexual tonicity
  • Aphrodisiac action
  • Female hormone regulation
  • Hair loss prevention
  • Promotes hair growth

It has a calming effect on the nerves and is also effective in times of irritation. Besides sex, Ylang Ylang scent can also help you to improve your relationship because it is useful when you have a fight or a bad atmosphere.


While the above two extracted their scent from flowers, this sandalwood extracts its scent from wood. Sandalwood is characterized by its ability to work on the nerves, harmonizing and calming the mind.

It also helps you to concentrate, so you can use the scent to create a bedtime atmosphere.

And sandalwood is effective in improving urinary and reproductive system problems and is also useful for erectile dysfunction (ED) in men.

You can’t have sex with a man if he doesn’t have an erection when sex starts.

There are many causes of erectile dysfunction, but mental health is a major factor. Smelling the scent of sandalwood will calm your mind and help you have passionate sex.

Other benefits include:

  • Antidepressant effect
  • Diuretic action
  • Calming effect
  • Cardiostimulating effect
  • Blood purification
  • Removes lymphatic congestion
  • Aphrodisiac action

There are a number of things that can help.

If your partner is having trouble getting an erection, or if you are unable to concentrate and have sex with him, the scent of sandalwood will help you to calm down and get into the act.

Clary Sage

Clary Sage has both a calming and uplifting effect on the mind and a calming and uplifting effect on the mood.

It has been used since ancient times as an aphrodisiac to increase sexual desire in both men and women because of its aphrodisiac properties.

It’s the perfect scent to use at bedtime, so if you’ve been feeling low on libido lately …… or not feeling uplifted or aroused, try using Clary Sage’s scent at bedtime.

Other benefits include:

  • Antidepressant effect
  • Calming effect
  • Uplifting action
  • Stress reduction
  • Pain relief
  • Female hormone regulation
  • Insomnia improvement

It has 2 effects as sedative and uplifting, but it’s the uplifting effect that you want to see working during sex.

Clary sage also has an aphrodisiac effect, so the uplifting effect is often stronger than the uplifting effect.

When you use it in bed, you want to smell this scent and have exciting sex.


Neroli acts on the nerves and helps to maintain a balance between excitement and sedation, which also helps to regulate autonomic disturbances.

It has a high analgesic effect and can help relieve pain from nervous abdominal pain and diarrhea.

It is also effective in relieving the symptoms of irregular menstruation, premenstrual syndrome and menopausal symptoms that are specific to women. Its aphrodisiac properties can help to enhance femininity.

It has a gentler scent than ylang-ylang, which is known for its aphrodisiac effects, and can stimulate a man’s libido, which may cause him to demand more intensely than usual.

Other effects include:

  • Antidepressant effect
  • Digestion enhancement
  • Pain relief
  • Calming effect
  • Female hormone regulation
  • Aphrodisiac action
  • Restful sleep
  • Nerve tonic properties
  • Anti-aging action

It is a citrusy scent because it is extracted from orange blossoms, and it is recommended to be used as a room fragrance because the scent can be strong when applied directly to the skin as a perfume.

If you spray it a few times in the room before sex begins, the neroli will give you an intense sex effect.

Summary: Break the rut by making the most of your scent!

In this article, we’ve introduced the reasons why scenting helps you to get rid of the rut, the effect it has on your brain, and five recommended scents.

If you have been with your partner for a long time, you may get bored with him or her, or you seek stimulation and you may find yourself turning to others.

You may not know if this can happen to you or your partner, but if you don’t do something about it, you may end up breaking up with him or her.

Some ways to get out of the rut include incorporating adult products and acting differently, but a more casual approach that can be done and reminds you of the beginning when it was fresh is the use of scent.

Scenting is deeply connected to memory and can link you to the excitement and memories of your relationship.

Scenting can make you feel even more affectionate towards your partner and can surprise them with a different version of yourself.

If you want to break out of a rut somehow, remember how you felt when you were together, or enjoy sex in a casual way without doing anything special, the aphrodisiac scents we’ve introduced to you during sex can help you get out of the rut!

If you want to make the sex more exciting… you can’t go wrong with situation play!

Learn more about the effects of scents.